Introduction
One of the most common, and certainly one of the most important undertakings in family mediation (family dispute resolution) is the creation of a parenting plan. When a couple successfully manages to accomplish this the likelihood of an amicable, positive split is significantly increased.
What Is a Parenting Plan Mediation?
Parenting plans are profoundly useful documents for maintaining a strong parenting relationship outside of the ending of the marriage or defacto relationship.
A parenting plan outlines how parenting will happen both now and into the future. It sets out what needs to be done, how it will be done, and the responsibilities each parent has.
A parenting plan is based on the identified needs of the children in the present and into the future. The best interests of the children are at the heart of the plan.
The plan can be as broad or as narrow as need be and each is unique and dependent on the family it will support.
How is Parenting Plan Mediation Different from a Family Court Hearing?
There are a number of significant differences. Firstly, in family mediation the two client parents have to work collaboratively to develop their parenting plan. In a court hearing the two parent parties are adversaries each trying to get decisions made that favour their perceptions. This format doesn’t lend itself to establishing a positive parenting relationship going forward as well as collaborative mediation. As such the future for the split family is more likely to feature conflict, acrimony, heightened emotional states, and mistrust.
Secondly, in parenting mediation it is the parents making the decisions. They know the children best and are empowered to develop a plan that best suits their unique situation. In the Family Court a judge hears from both parties (usually via their lawyers) and then makes decisions based on what they perceive will be the best interests of the children. The parents are disempowered. The decisions are made by a stranger based on the submissions they’ve heard. It is easy to argue that this is simply not a desirable pathway to go down if, as parents, you wish to make a realistic, authentic, targeted plan for your children.
Thirdly, and rather awkwardly, Family Court decisions are legally binding with consequences for failing to follow the orders handed down. If part of the court order isn’t working for either party they’re not able to simply contact the other party and agree on a change (as you can with a mediated parenting plan.) The party seeking change has to have their lawyer seek another Family Court hearing to seek an amendment to the orders. This will likely take months and potentially years to be actioned.
How to Create a Parenting Plan Through Mediation
Mediation is based on two important foundation concepts. Firstly, the best interests of the children are top priority. Secondly, both parties are acting in good faith to ensure the best interests of the children are identified and met. The steps taken do accomplish this are as follows:
Agree to Try Mediation
The Family Court expects parents to attempt mediation prior to any form of litigation. With this in mind both parents need to anticipate family mediation as part of the divorce process. Family lawyers are able to explain this to clients as are family mediation providers.
Choose an Accredited Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner (FDRP)
A potential client makes contact with a family mediation provider who will seek some information about their unique situation. If mediation is deemed appropriate (there’s a few reasons why it may not be including evidence of family violence) the family mediator will invite the client’s former partner to take part in an intake session.
Prepare for Your Mediation Session
The most important part of preparing for a parenting plan mediation is engaging in an intake session with the mediator (more formally, a family dispute resolution practitioner.) This is a confidential, private session with just the client and mediator talking. The mediator will gather lots of information about the family, issues in to be highlighted, thoughts on possible pathways forward, and best and worst case scenarios. The mediator will provide the client with a wealth of information about mediation, ways to prepare, referral information, and resources to ponder around the plan itself.
Intake sessions take place for both clients individually.
In preparing for family mediation the mediator will encourage you to mentally and emotionally prepare yourself with a range of ideas and strategies to consider. They will note steps to take to ensure you’re able to manage your ideas around the parenting plan and they will outline communication and behavioural expectations.
Importantly, your mediator is there to answer questions. Whatever springs to mind, ask your mediator! One of the keys to a successful mediation is preparedness and leaning into mediator support will ensure this.
Attend the Mediation Session
Once at a parenting plan mediation it’s important to let the mediator facilitate the discussion.
Your thoughts will be on the contributions you’ll be making and having prepared well you’ll be able to contribute your thoughts and ideas and have these recognised.
You’re safe in the knowledge that you have the time and context in which to contribute and that no interruptions will occur.
Negotiate and Draft the Parenting Plan
As part of the family mediation process your parenting plan will begin to take shape. Your mediator will be taking notes, asking questions, and identifying areas of agreement. They will reality test ideas, offer up scenarios to consider, and document the discussion as it leads towards greater agreement.
It is this documenting, that is the basis of the parenting plan and by the end of the mediation session it will be ready to use.
Sign and Store the Parenting Plan
Following the development of the parenting plan your family mediator will draft and distribute it for both parties to sign. The mediator will keep a copy of the plan.
Parenting Plan Mediation Checklist
The following is a checklist of aspects of most parenting plans. These factors are the nuts and bolts of what positive parent planning involves.
Living and time arrangements
Which parent are the children with, when, and for how long.
Where will the children primarily live?
Is there a primary place of residence with one parent having greater time with the children. Where is this?
What is the regular weekly schedule (school nights, weekends)?
This includes the current (and potentially future) commitments the children have including school, sport, hobbies, community groups etc. It can also include expected bedtimes, routines, behaviour expectations, and child responsibilities.
How will changeovers be managed (time, location, transport)?
Who is doing pick ups and drop offs, what time, what if a party is running late or there’s an emergency?
What happens if one parent wants to relocate?
This can occur for a number of reasons such as caring, or employment responsibilities. How will this be navigated, what impact will it have on time with the children, how will potential changes be decided upon?
Holidays, Special Occasions and School Breaks
This includes managing time with extended family, holidays away that impact on the other parent’s time with the children, and things like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day and how occasions will be managed.
Education and Health Decisions
This can be significant as it impacts two central aspects of a child’s life. How will the children manage, make decisions, and address concerns should all be detailed.
Communication Between Parents and Children
Again, the how, when, what of the situation is important.
Conclusion
By way of conclusion, it is easy to note just how much effort is required to ensure a positive parenting mediation is undertaken.
If you’re seeking to give parenting planning the effort and focus required to ensure the best interests of your children are maintained then Resolutions Australia is ready to support. We encourage you to get in touch and take the first steps towards a brighter future for you and your children!
Frequently Asked Questions
How long does it take to create a parenting plan through mediation?
Most parent plans created through Resolutions Australia are completed within a standard 4 hour mediation.
What if my ex-partner refuses to attend parenting plan mediation?
That happens occasionally. If the mediator has sent an invitation and the response is negative or no response happens then they will provide the willing client with a section 60i certificate that outlines the circumstances. This certificate may be seen favourably during future Family Court litigation.
Can a parenting plan be changed after it is signed?
Yes it certainly can as long as both parties agree. For significant changes we recommend re-engaging with your Resolutions Australia mediator to support your efforts.
Do I need a lawyer for parenting plan mediation?
No. The majority of family mediations Resolutions Australia carries out have no lawyers involved. If both parties agree then lawyers are able to be present however they are only able to advise their client and not contribute to the mediation. The additional cost is payable by the client.
How much does parenting plan mediation cost in Australia?
Great question! Private family mediation practices usually cost between $2000 and $6000. At Resolutions we’ve developed an online mediation model that enables us to charge just $1600. It’s accessible, timely, very cost effective, and has proven results.
